Written by Doublethink (29/4/08 )
To test Gretel's mettle a pair of imbeciles were given the chance to host Big Brother and to everyone's surprise, they did a far better job than her.
Kyle Sandilands, looking tired in the photo above is giving us the internationally acknowledged symbol of the "woni' with his hands. For those hindered by a lack of general knowledge... a "woni" is a symbolic representation of a vagina. Kyle is telling us he's a tired cunt. Jackie-O on the otherhand tells us in this photo that she is a slave to the male gaze. Teasingly receptive to it, she smiles to greet it, however her body is turned away as she carries on with her hand imbedded in the ruffles between her legs.
We were always given the image that Kyle was a cunt and Jackie-0 a self absorbed bimbo? Well that's true to a point, but they managed to put on a BB Launch Show that was well paced with as little hyperbolic crap & blatantly over advertorial hype as possible.
Kyle's job was easy, be yourself and try to look human. Kyle did look somewhat wooden, a stuffed wombat on stage startled by oncoming headlights...his left eye twitching uncontrollably for most the show, I was afraid the producers would shoot him with another tranquilliser dart.
Jackie-0's job was the hardest of all. Jackie's main role during the launch show was to re-aquaint us all on what a woman really looks like. After the many years of neglet and outright abuse of the female form that Gretel inflicted on us, it was delightful to see feminine beauty again.
A whole generation of Big Brother fans had never seen a female host look effortlessly beautiful whilst wearing something that perfectly suited her. Jackie-0 gets the Fred Hollows award for 2008....it was as if we were getting corrective eye surgery just by watching her.
No comments:
Post a Comment